A few nights ago, my foster daughter was mad and pitching a fit because we told her to pick up some of her toys. She picked up her toys, but was determined to show us how upset she was. So, she stood in the middle of the living room screaming, crying, and just being loud. I asked her, “Josie, please stop crying. You aren’t in trouble, you have picked up your toys, you can go play.” Now, I was speaking to her in a nice, calm voice. I wasn’t fussing or raising my voice, I was trying to calm her. All she needed to do was go play. Josie, being 2 years old, for some reason didn’t respond well to my articulate request to lower the amazing volume being produced by her tiny lungs and vocal cords. This was beginning to get on my nerves.
I asked her a second time, “Josie, there is no need for this. Please, calm down and stop crying.” This time, as I asked her I hugged her. I thought maybe if I showed her love she would realize she wasn’t in trouble and everything is ok. This did absolutely… nothing to clam her or quiet her. She wanted us to know she was upset.
A third time I gave her the chance. “Baby girl, please, stop crying.” This time, she decided to respond to my request. Just, not in the way I had hoped. She put her hands on her hips, wrinkled her brow, took a deep breath and screamed, “NO! I’M CRYING! MAD AT YOU, DADDY!” Let me just say, that’ll bless ya!
I had enough at this point. She would not be reasoned with. “Josie, go to your room until you are done crying.” I told her. She turned, screaming as loud as she could and ran to her room. At least she listened. Then, she did something extra. To emphasize her anger, she slammed her door. Now, this wouldn’t normally be a big deal, but we put a child-lock on her door to keep her from wondering the house at night. (We have a monitor system in place, it’s safe.)
I could have went immediately and let her out, but I thought I would let this play out. After about five more minutes of screaming, I went and opened the door to find a pretty distraught little girl on the other side. She opened her arms wide and grabbed me. I picked her up, hugged her, and held her tight. “Daddy locked me in my room!” She exclaimed. “Honey, you did that to yourself.” I told her. I asked her again, “Are you done pitching a fit and crying now?” With a frown on her face and tears rolling down her cheeks, she nodded her head, “Yes.” I wiped her tears, nose and face, kissed her on the cheek, and set her down to play.
This made me think, “How many times are we two year old girls pitching a fit?” Think about it. How many times does God tell us to do something that needs to be done. We refuse, or tell God, “I don’t want to do that.” or “I’m not called to that.” or “God, someone else could do it better.” God may even persist, asking us multiple times in multiple ways, showing us love all along the way. Then, after we continue to resist Him, He disciplines us. When He does, we may get even madder and “slam our door.” We may go to a sin that gives us instant pleasure, or stop going to church, or find some way to rebel against God to show our anger. After our disobedience, the consequence of our sin hits us. What do we do in response? “God, why did you allow this? God, why didn’t you stop this? God, this is Your fault!” No, too many times, we do cause pain to ourselves because we don’t know how to handle God’s discipline to make us more like Jesus.
Do not despise the Lord’s instruction, my son, and do not loathe His discipline; for the Lord disciplines the one He loves, just as a father, the son he delights in. – Proverbs 3:11, 12
Let’s stop being 2 year old girls.
(Unless you are a two year old girl. Then it’s ok.)
In Christ,
jon walton
You Did That To Yourself...
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